Hospitals and Funerals

My father's eldest sister, the matriarch of a very large family, died at the age of 84 (?) in upstate New York yesterday morning. Was considering going with my father to the funeral, but felt it best to stay put. My aunt had a series of strokes, the first one even before her husband passed away in 1995, and was never told that her son, daughter, and brother also passed away in the last few years. She managed to outlive them all. But her kidneys were failing, and in the end, which we knew was coming, her health gave way.

My Auntie Jane practically raised my father, being nearly 20 years older than he, and I think her firstborn came along even before my grandmother had my father. This was back in the day when bigger families were economies of scale -- that is, mass production brought good results at a lower cost. Big families also met the demand for labour. I've heard enough hardship stories from my father to last a lifetime, but in pre-war agricultural northern Philippines, how much did one really need? There was no television to remind you of what you could have, wear, eat, or otherwise covet from other people. Nobody even kept track of birth dates. My father only knows the season he was born in, because everything revolved around farming cycles, i.e. planting, harvesting, rainy seasons, and other agrarian concerns. So when it came time to produce a birth date for documents, he picked one he found scratched into the bottom of the house -- March 8. As good a date as any.

I was in upstate New York a year ago for a brief visit before getting back to Manhattan for New Year's Eve, and discussed with my cousin how she would live after her mother passes away. I'm hoping she takes another job and moves closer to Manhattan to get back to the life she had before she became her mother's caregiver. As admirable as she has been in this role, for so long, I recognize it's been a major sacrifice.

Then I heard from my brother this afternoon, who was with my sister-in-law for their regular testing at BC Women's Hospital today. The test results were not as positive as they should be, so now Cheryl is admitted full-time, and a caesarean is planned, the timing of which will be determined by further observation.

My mother is still in Surrey Memorial Hospital. Her WCB claim was denied, so ICBC had better cough up for her home care.